I shouldn't be. It's not how things were ever supposed to go for me. [The calm conviction that he had been showing all this time is gradually becoming a little less calm, more insistent and frustrated. He doesn't know how to explain this to people, he's never had to before.]

I was never supposed to stay anywhere this long, it's not how things were supposed to be. If I even try to get close to people it can only end badly for them - that hasn't changed, it never will. [And this just goes to prove it, as far as he's concerned. His occasional visits with Tanyuu and Adashino back home, yearly meetings with Isaza - that's the most he was ever supposed to have, after all.]